My last date.

"Why won't you open up to me? I need to know how you feel. About me. About us."

So I showed her my source code.

"I can't believe you're so shallow and so in need of refactoring at the same time. Look, get back to me when you've cleaned up all this stuff from previous relationships. And haven't you ever heard of an abstraction? Let me give you the private IM of a CMM7 developer in Cairo."

Somehow I haven't been the same since the rewrite.